10 Sneaky Ways Narcissists Try to Hoover You Back In
Dealing with a narcissist can be emotionally draining and challenging, especially when they try to sneak back into your life. These individuals are experts at manipulating and deceiving others to get what they want. Here are 10 sneaky ways narcissists try to hoover you back in.
1. Love Bombing
Narcissists are known for their ability to shower you with love and affection when they want something from you. They will use flattery, gifts, and kind gestures to reel you back in and make you feel special.
They will make you believe that they have changed or that they truly care about you, only to revert back to their old ways once they have you back under their control.
It’s essential to remember that love bombing is not genuine and is simply a tactic used by narcissists to manipulate you.
2. Gaslighting
Gaslighting is a common manipulation technique used by narcissists to make you doubt your reality and sanity. They will twist the truth, deny their actions, and blame you for their behavior to make you feel confused and question your perceptions.
By gaslighting you, narcissists aim to gain control over your thoughts and emotions, making it easier for them to hoover you back into a toxic relationship.
Recognizing gaslighting behavior is crucial in protecting yourself from falling back into the narcissist’s trap.
3. Triangulation
Narcissists often use triangulation as a way to create jealousy and insecurity in their victims. They may introduce a new person into the dynamic, whether it be an ex-partner, friend, or colleague, to make you feel inadequate and insecure.
By triangulating you, narcissists seek to regain power and control over the situation, making you more susceptible to their manipulation tactics.
Understanding the purpose behind triangulation can help you see through the narcissist’s intentions and avoid being hoovered back into their toxic environment.
4. Silent Treatment
The silent treatment is a classic tactic used by narcissists to punish and manipulate their victims. They will ignore you, withhold communication, and disappear without a trace to make you feel anxious, guilty, and desperate for their attention.
By employing the silent treatment, narcissists aim to assert dominance and control over you, making it easier for them to reel you back into their toxic cycle.
Recognizing the silent treatment for what it is can help you protect yourself and set boundaries to prevent being hoovered back in.
5. False Promises
Narcissists are notorious for making false promises and commitments that they have no intention of keeping. They will tell you what you want to hear, whether it be about changing their behavior, seeking help, or working on the relationship, only to backtrack on their words once they have you back under their influence.
It’s essential to view their promises with skepticism and hold them accountable for their actions rather than falling into the trap of false hope.
Keeping a realistic perspective on the narcissist’s behavior can help you avoid being hoovered back in by their empty promises.
6. Pity Play
Narcissists often play the victim to manipulate others into feeling sorry for them and coming to their rescue. They will evoke sympathy, guilt, and compassion to make you feel obligated to help them or stay in their lives.
By playing the pity card, narcissists aim to elicit an emotional response from you, making it easier for them to manipulate and control your actions.
Recognizing the pity play tactic can help you maintain your emotional boundaries and protect yourself from being hoovered back into a toxic relationship.
7. Smear Campaign
Narcissists may resort to spreading rumors, lies, and negative information about you to tarnish your reputation and isolate you from others. They will discredit you, manipulate situations, and turn people against you to make you feel isolated and helpless.
By launching a smear campaign, narcissists seek to weaken your support system and make you more dependent on them for validation and approval.
Understanding the narcissist’s motives behind a smear campaign can help you stand strong against their manipulative tactics and avoid being hoovered back in through social isolation.
8. Future Faking
Future faking is a tactic used by narcissists to deceive you into believing they have long-term plans and intentions for the relationship. They will talk about marriage, family, and commitments to make you feel secure and hopeful about the future.
However, these promises are often empty and meant to string you along and keep you emotionally invested in the relationship without any real intention of following through.
Recognizing future faking behavior is crucial in protecting yourself from being hoovered back in by false hopes and promises.
9. Guilt Tripping
Narcissists are experts at using guilt as a weapon to manipulate and control others. They will make you feel responsible for their feelings, actions, and well-being, leading you to sacrifice your own needs and boundaries to appease them.
By guilt-tripping you, narcissists aim to maintain power and control over you, making it easier for them to reel you back into a toxic relationship.
Setting boundaries and recognizing when you are being guilt-tripped can help you protect yourself from falling back under the narcissist’s influence.
10. Love Bombing Redux
Love bombing redux refers to the cycle of idealization, devaluation, and re-idealization that narcissists use to keep you hooked on their approval and validation. After a period of devaluation and discard, they may cycle back to love bombing to draw you back in and regain your trust.
Understanding this cycle can help you break free from the narcissist’s toxic grip and avoid being hoovered back into a repetitive and harmful pattern.
Recognizing the signs of love bombing redux can empower you to prioritize your well-being and protect yourself from being lured back into a toxic relationship.
Conclusion
narcissists employ a variety of sneaky tactics to hoover you back into their toxic orbit. From love bombing to guilt tripping, gaslighting, and more, it’s essential to recognize these manipulation tactics, set boundaries, and prioritize your well-being to protect yourself from falling back into their destructive cycle. By understanding their behaviors and motives, you can break free from their control and reclaim your power and independence.